Maria+Holic, episode 6 – 1+1=Oh snap! Nosebleed!

Kanako asks the tough questions that need to be asked
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Remember how I was complaining about not enough Mariya and Matsurika for the past couple weeks? You know how Kanako’s blood loss for the last couple weeks had tapered off? Turns out there was a correlation. So now we got DOUBLE the Mariya and like quintuple the nosebleeds.

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It’s physical exam day and Kanako’s worried about how much she’s grown, which leads to a slight fit of insanity and ends with Mariya ordering Matsurika to douse Kanako with gasoline and set her on fire. Why oh why would they pour gasoline on such a chaste yuri girl? Maybe so they could have fun making fun of her height and how she smells. But Kanako’s got a lot on her mind, because she has a job to do. There’s a nurse shortage, and so they need the 2nd year class reps to help with the physical exam. How convenient.

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Unfortunately for Kanako, despite all the home remedies she takes, she doesn’t get very far. In fact, she doesn’t even get past Kiri-san getting undressed before she’s buried under a fountain of her own blood and sent to the infirmary. There go her hopes and dreams. With heaven just on the other side of Kanako’s curtain. Lucky for us, we get to be on the other side of that curtain in all of its Hatsune Miku and Ranka Lee glory. And who is that blue haired girl? Ami Kawashima? But then things take a turn for the crazier when Kanako overhears that Mariya is also getting checked out and jumps out of bed and opens the curtain to find Mariya in the nude with natural… well you’ve seen them by now. This puts Kanako into code red. The next nosebleed could be fatal. But what is this devilry? Mariya as a girl?

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Turns out Mariya has a twin sister named Shizu. Real deal woman who looks just like Mariya. Except she’s a cross dresser at the all boys school Mihoshi no Mori. Why are these two cross dressing when they could just be going to their appropriately gendered school? Well, it turns out grandma’s wishes, were for the two to cross dress successfully at the high schools for 3 years without being caught by any of the students – the winner gets to be the chairperson. Why do all that? So that they could understand the other gender better when they took over the two schools. Umm, it makes perfect sense… in a sick, twisted anime logic way. Except Matsurika calls them both out for the pervs they are, as they’re both only doing this for fun.

Since Kanako wasn’t a student at the time she found out Mariya was a boy, he’s technically still in the game. But… it’s bad news for Shizu, because now she’s been outed. I loved how they designed and animated the scene where Mariya knows he has Shizu trapped. There was something very Death Note-ish about it. The bold colors, the evil voice, the sinister music, the red eyes. I would’ve swore Yagami Light had possessed Mariya’s body for a second. But Mariya’s a tranny with a big heart, and offers to let Shizu go if she kisses his feet. She shivers, and quivers but rejects Mariya’s bullying and tries to run out of the room in tears with full melodramatic BG to boot. Except she forgot the door was locked. Awesomely moe scene indeed. Kanako also gives us a little sign that she may fall for Mariya and his whole boy thing anyway.

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The last couple minutes takes a hilariously dramatic turn when Honoka reveals that her underwear has been stolen from the sick bay. All eyes turn to Kanako when she reveals a detail she shouldn’t know. Will Kanako’s yuri dreams meet a sudden end? Is there another hentai on the loose? Underpants gnomes? I bet it was Lucchini again.

I gotta say I loved this episode. I mean, first of all you got a real deal female Mariya-clone, which makes me feel… better that I have a trap alternative. But we also got to see what I love most about this show, which is Mariya and Matsurika’s totally psycho, sadistic nature. And Kanako got to chip in with little brilliant nuggets (hentai? moe?), at least when she wasn’t gushing blood every 2 seconds. Let’s be honest, Kanako is never going to cut it as a yuri if she’s going to bleed to death before she even gets to first base. By default, I think that raises the Mariya flag.

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